Fun questions for wedding guests: the ones Indian families keep on the RSVP, and the ones they delete
Fun questions for wedding guests that Indian families keep, from Team Bride or Team Groom to a song for the DJ, the ones they delete, and wording to copy.
Ask two or three fun questions at most, keep them optional, and keep them apart from the headcount. Indian families keep Team Bride or Team Groom, a song for the DJ and one blessing or piece of advice. They delete bets on who will cry first or who will be the boss at home where elders will read them, and any question that names a function some guests are not invited to.
On this page
Fun questions are the part of a wedding invitation guests enjoy answering, and the part families argue about. On our calls this October, the RSVP came up with most families. Many went through their fun questions one by one, and many deleted at least one.
This page lists the questions that stayed, the ones that were cut and why, how to keep the fun apart from the headcount, and wording in English and Hindi you can copy.
What a fun question is, and what it is not
A fun question is anything on the reply form that is not about coming: a poll, a bet, a song request, a blessing. It makes the invitation sound like your family, and it gives friends a reason to open the link a second time.
It is not the RSVP. The RSVP is four plain questions: will you come, how many of you, which functions, and do you need a stay. Our RSVP guide covers those. The fun goes after them.
The fun questions families keep
| Question | Why it works | Who should see it |
|---|---|---|
| Team Bride or Team Groom? | One tap, and both sides of the family can play | Friends, cousins and the family who enjoy it |
| Which song gets you on the dance floor? | The DJ can use the answers at the sangeet | Guests invited to the sangeet |
| One blessing or one piece of advice for the couple | Elders like this one: it reads as an aashirwad, not a game | Everyone, elders included |
| What should he know about being married to her? | Friends and cousins write the funniest answers | Friends and cousins |
| Your wedding personality: the dancer, the foodie, the photographer, the one who knows everyone | A poll with options, so nobody has to type | Friends and cousins |
| At a baby shower: boy or girl, your guess? | A guess and nothing more | Everyone at the baby shower |
What these have in common: each one is about the guest or a blessing, none of them is about anyone's weakness, and most are answered with one tap.
The ones families delete, and why
| Question | Why families cut it | Where it can stay |
|---|---|---|
| Who will cry first at the vidaai? | Friends love it. The bride's parents read it too, and the vidaai is not a joke for them | The friends' link |
| Who will be the boss at home? | Elders read it as a dig at one family | Nowhere, usually |
| A bet on the joota chupai, the stealing of the groom's shoes | It turns a custom between the two sides into a contest, and can sound too young for senior guests | The cousins' and friends' link |
| Which function are you most excited for? | It lists every function, so a reception-only guest learns what they were not invited to | Nowhere |
| Anything in Gen-Z slang | Elders do not follow it, and call the family to ask what it means | Written plainly, or on the friends' link |
We do not add teasing questions on our own. Families know which uncle will laugh and which aunty will call; the questions on the invitation are the ones you choose.
Keep the fun apart from the headcount
- Ask about coming first, in polite, positive words. 'Yes, I will be there' and 'Sorry, I cannot make it'. One groom on our calls asked for positive answers only.
- Make every fun question optional. A required poll can cost you an elder's reply.
- Put the fun after the reply, so a guest who stops halfway has already said yes or no.
- Read the answers as a crowd. Nobody needs to know which uncle voted that the groom will cry first.
- Two or three questions, not ten. Each extra one is another reason to close the form.
When elders will not fill a form, make it a message board
Several couples removed the RSVP altogether ('RSVP nahi chahiye') because their elders would not fill it. One family kept the space and turned it into a board with three boxes: your name, a song, and one line of advice for the couple. Nobody had to tick anything, and the answers read like a guest book.
For the headcount, call the elders. A call still gets the answer a form does not, and someone in the family can enter it with the rest. Our guide to invitations elders can open has more on this.
Writing your own: five rules
- Write it for the oldest person who will see itIf Nani will read it, she should be able to answer it, or at least smile at it.
- Never name a function in a question everyone seesA guest invited only to the reception should not learn about the haldi from a poll. Our guide to inviting guests to only some functions explains why.
- Give options, not a blank boxA tap is easy on a phone; a text box is homework. Keep one free box for blessings.
- Nothing that teases one family in front of the otherBets on who is in charge, who is late or who will cry are fine among friends and risky with in-laws.
- Choose them yourselvesYou know your families. A designer can word a question well, but only you know who will take it the wrong way.
How Invifest does this
Invifest makes invitations and guest management for weddings and every big moment. Our designers make each family its own invitation website, and the reply part works like this:
- Your questions, as polls. The reply form carries the questions you choose, and guests answer the fun ones as polls, with a tap.
- A reply for each function. Guests tick the functions they are coming to, from the functions on their own link only.
- A separate link for each side or group. The elders' link can leave the fun questions out, or the whole form, and the friends' link can keep the bets. Each guest sees only their own functions.
- Replies in one private place. Every reply goes to a private RSVP console that comes with your invitation, not to anyone's email.
- Aangan for the whole guest list. With Aangan you keep the list in one place, send every guest their own invitation from your own WhatsApp, a tap each, and see who is coming to which function. Its Mehfil page shows the bets, polls, songs for the dance floor and blessings as a crowd, with nobody named.
- Change a question after sending. The link you already shared updates by itself. On our newest invitations you tap the spot and say or type what to change.
- English and Hindi. On many designs a switch turns the invitation into Hindi for the elders.
- Ready in 3 days from the day we have your details, or in under 24 hours on request.
Fun questions and reply wording you can copy
English first, then Hindi. Change the names and options in [brackets], and keep only the questions your families will enjoy.
Will you be joining us?
Yes, I will be there
Sorry, I cannot make it. My blessings are with you.
How many of you are coming? [Number]
Which functions will you come to? [Only the functions on this guest's link]
क्या आप पधारेंगे?
जी हाँ, ज़रूर आऊँगा / आऊँगी
इस बार नहीं आ पाऊँगा / पाऊँगी, आशीर्वाद सदा साथ है
कितने लोग आएँगे? [संख्या]
किन कार्यक्रमों में आएँगे? [इस मेहमान के कार्यक्रम]
Team Bride or Team Groom?
Team Bride / Team Groom / Both, obviously
Which song gets you on the dance floor?
[Song name]
One blessing or one piece of advice for [Bride's name] and [Groom's name]
[Write a line]
आप किसकी टीम में हैं?
टीम दुल्हन / टीम दूल्हा / दोनों की
कौन-सा गाना बजे तो आप नाचने आ जाएँगे?
[गाने का नाम]
[दुल्हन का नाम] और [दूल्हे का नाम] के लिए एक आशीर्वाद या एक सलाह
[एक पंक्ति लिखें]
What should [Groom's name] know about being married to [Bride's name]?
[Your answer]
Your wedding personality?
The dancer / The foodie / The photographer / The one who knows everyone
Who will cry first at the vidaai?
[Bride's name] / [Groom's name] / [Bride's name]'s papa / Everyone
Leave us a blessing
Your name: [Name]
A song for the sangeet: [Song]
One line for [Bride's name] and [Groom's name]: [Your blessing or advice]
हमें आशीर्वाद दीजिए
आपका नाम: [नाम]
संगीत के लिए एक गाना: [गाना]
[दुल्हन का नाम] और [दूल्हे का नाम] के लिए एक पंक्ति: [आपका आशीर्वाद या सलाह]
Just for fun: boy or girl, your guess?
Boy / Girl / Either way, a blessing
बस मज़े के लिए, आपका अंदाज़ा: बेटा या बेटी?
बेटा / बेटी / जो भी हो, आशीर्वाद है
Namaste [Name] ji,
Our invitation is here, with every function and the venue:
[link]
Please reply by [date]. And do answer the two questions at the end: the DJ is waiting for your song!
Want these words on a real invitation? See the designs.
Invitation designs
6 designs you can personalise. Open any one to see it full size, with a live demo.
Questions people ask
What are some fun questions to ask wedding guests?
Team Bride or Team Groom, which song gets them on the dance floor, one blessing or piece of advice for the couple, what the groom should know about being married to the bride, and their wedding personality as a quick poll. Keep it to two or three, with options to tap rather than boxes to fill.
What questions should a wedding RSVP ask?
Four: will you come, how many of you, which functions (only those the guest is invited to), and do you need a stay. Fun questions come after these and are optional.
Should fun questions be on the RSVP form?
They can sit at the end of it, as long as they are optional and kept apart from the headcount. A guest who skips them has still replied.
Which fun questions can offend Indian elders?
Bets on who will cry first at the vidaai or who will be the boss at home, a bet on the joota chupai, and slang the elders do not follow. Families on our calls cut these from the links elders see, or wrote them more plainly.
Is 'which function are you most excited for' a good question?
Not on a link that goes to everyone. It lists every function, so a guest invited only to the reception learns about the rest. One family removed it for exactly that reason.
How many fun questions should a wedding invitation have?
Two or three. Each extra question is one more reason to close the form before replying.
Can elders get the invitation without the fun questions?
Yes. Give them their own link, without the questions or even without the form, and keep the polls on the friends' link. With Invifest each side or group can have its own link, and each guest sees only their own functions.
Who sees the answers to the fun questions?
The family does. On an Invifest invitation they reach your private RSVP console, kept apart from who is coming, and Aangan's Mehfil page shows the bets, polls, songs and blessings as a crowd, with nobody named.
Can we change a fun question after the invitation is sent?
Yes. The link you already shared updates by itself. On our newest invitations you tap the spot on the invitation and say or type what to change.
What if elders will not fill the RSVP at all?
Call them, and enter their answer with the others: a call still gets the answer a form does not. Some families turn the form into a message board instead, with a name, a song and one line of blessing.
