Mayra and bhaat invitation: the nyota to the mama, the card for relatives, and Hindi wording to copy

What the mayra or bhaat is

The mayra is the maternal family's part in a wedding. When a woman's son or daughter marries, her brothers, often with her father, fill the mayra: they bring the wedding outfit and jewellery for the bride or groom, clothes for their sister, her husband and the rest of her household, sweets, and cash. Aaj Tak, reporting on a mayra in Nagaur, put it in one line: "मायरा (भात) बहन के बच्चों की शादी में ननिहाल पक्ष द्वारा निभाई जाने वाली एक प्राचीन परंपरा है", an old tradition the maternal family keeps at the wedding of a sister's children (Aaj Tak, December 2024).

It happens on both sides. The bride's mother receives a mayra from her brothers and the groom's mother from hers, each at her own home. One wedding we made invitations for this season had the bride's bhaat at six in the evening, and the groom's on the same card as his mehndi and haldi.

The names, region by region

On our calls this October, the mayra or bhaat came up again and again, and families spelled it every way: Mayra, Myra, Maayra, Mayera and Mahera, and for the bhaat, chaak bhaat, chak bhaat or simply mama ka bhaat. One Jain family called the afternoon of its mayra and mehendi "Nani ka ghar". Write it the way your family says it: relatives look for their own word first.

Two invitations: the nyota and the card

A mayra has two invitations, sent by two different people:

There is often a third. The mama's family brings its own relatives along, and sends them a message with the day and the time they set off. News reports from Rajasthan describe mayras arriving with a band, on decorated bullock carts, or in a long line of cars.

The bhaat nyota: how the mother invites her brother

The nyota is the old way of inviting, and in many families it still happens in person. On a day the elders choose, the mother goes to her parents' home, her peehar, and asks her brothers to bring the bhaat for her child's wedding. Rajasthani families call this the battisi nutna (बत्तीसी नूतना), and Haryanvi families the bhaat nyotna.

1. Before she goesIn some families she puts on mehendi before she sets out.
2. What she takesJaggery and rice, in many families with moong, a coconut and sweets. One guide to Maheshwari customs puts it at one and a quarter kilos each of rice and jaggery.
3. The tilakShe puts a tilak on her brother's forehead, and on her sister-in-law's, offers sweets, and asks him to bring the bhaat.
4. Her send-offIn many families, before she leaves, they put a tilak on her and give her a saree.

If her brother lives abroad or in another city, the visit becomes a phone call and then a message. One is written for that in the wording below.

What happens on the mayra day

The mayra arrives a day or two before the wedding, or on the wedding morning, at the sister's home or at the wedding venue. Every family has its own order; a common one:

1. The welcome at the doorThe sister and the women of the house come to the door singing, and she puts a tilak on her brothers, their wives and their children.
2. The chunariIn many Rajasthani families the brothers together drape a chunari over their sister.
3. The giftsThe wedding outfit and jewellery for the bride or groom, clothes for the sister, her husband and the household, and cash, given openly.
4. The aartiShe performs the aarti, and in many families the brothers place envelopes on the aarti plate.
5. The mealThe mama's family is seated and fed first.

On the invitations we made this season, mayras ran from morning to evening: one opened a seven-function wedding at eleven in the morning, one was at two in the afternoon, one at four in the afternoon on the bride's side, and one family held the haldi and the bhaat together at seven in the morning.

On our calls, families put it in one of three places: the afternoon of the day before the wedding; the first day, before the evening's sangeet ("pehle myra, shaam ko sangeet"); or straight after the mehndi, at a venue of its own. One family had already held its mayra before the invitation went out, and left it off.

What to put on a mayra or bhaat card

The maternal family's line matters most, because it is their day. One family put it above the venue on their chaak bhaat card: the mama's name and family with their town, and a second relative beside them.

The bhaat line, and the families who bring it

A line families put under the heading: "chak ki pooja, mama ka bhaat, apno se saji har baat" (चाक की पूजा, मामा का भात, अपनों से सजी हर बात). Under it go the families bringing the bhaat, each with its town in brackets, beside the ननिहाल पक्ष list. The wording to copy is below.

Expect that list to grow. Families sent us names to add even after the card had gone out, so check every name and town with the mama's family before it is sent, and keep the list somewhere it can still be changed.

On the wedding card, or a card of its own

Many families put the mayra on the wedding card as one of the functions, with its own time. The Marwari card in our Hindi wedding card guide lists it as मायरा (माहेरा दस्तूर), between the pithi and the mahila sangeet, with a ननिहाल पक्ष line at the bottom.

A card or a message of its own makes sense when the mayra is at home and the wedding at a venue, when only close family is expected for it, or when the mama's family is inviting its own relatives to come along.

Bride's card or groom's card?

The mayra goes on the card of the side whose mother's family brings it. The bride's mother receives a mayra from her brothers, so it belongs on the bride's side's card; when the groom's mother receives one from hers, the groom's card carries it. Almost every family who talked to us about it this October put it on the invitation, and we saw it both ways:

• On the bride's card only. "Groom side me bhaat ka function add nahi karna hai", one family told us, and another: "ladki walon ko mayra dikhega".
• On the groom's card. At another wedding the groom's card carried his mother's mayra, brought by her brothers.
• On both, each its own. When both mothers receive a mayra, each side's version shows its own, at its own time and place.

Because the mayra belongs to one mother's family, it appears only on that side's version of the invitation. One groom's link this season said only 'Mehendi', because, as his family told us, the mayra was not from his side, while the bride's version of the same wedding read 'Mayra & Mehendi'. A Marwari family titled its mayra 'Padharo Sa' and wrote 'Mayra' under it, so the elders knew which function it was. Our guide to bride's side and groom's side invitations covers the two versions.

Sending it on WhatsApp

1. The nyota comes firstSend nothing to the mama's family before the mother has been to her peehar. A forwarded card that reaches them before the nyota can hurt.
2. Then the relativesSend the mayra card or message with the wedding invitation, or two to three weeks before.
3. Guests invited to the mayra aloneSome families invite a few guests to the mayra only. Send them an invitation that shows only the mayra, with its time, place and map, and ask how many are coming: the meal after it is cooked for a number.
4. Share the map with the mama's familyThey travel as a group: send the address, a map pin on the gate and where the cars can park.
5. A reminder the day beforeWith the time the mayra arrives, so the family is at the door to receive it.

For guests invited to only some functions, see inviting guests to selected functions, and for sending to a long list, how to send invitations on WhatsApp.

How Invifest makes a mayra card

Invifest makes invitations and guest management for weddings and every big moment: our designers make each family its own invitation website, with every function and every reply on one link. For a mayra, that means:

• The mayra on its own side's link. The bride's side and the groom's side each get their own link in the same design, so the mayra shows only on the side it belongs to, under the name your family uses.
• A mayra-only invitation. Guests invited to the mayra alone get a link that shows only the mayra. With Aangan, our guest dashboard, you tick the mayra for each of them, send every guest their own link from your own WhatsApp, and see who has opened it.
• A headcount for the meal. Replies come function by function, so you know how many are coming to the mayra, not only to the wedding.
• Names added late, on the same link. When another family joins the bhaat after the invitation has gone out, the names go on the same link, and everyone who opens it sees them. On the private review link we can send with the first version, you type the names yourself, so every spelling is exact.
• The moment, drawn. Families have asked us for the mayra itself on the card: the mother in the centre with her brothers in traditional dress, the mayra laid out behind them, the groom in his safa. One family wanted their own photograph there instead.
• Hindi, English or both, with one tap between them. The first version arrives within 3 days of your complete details, or in under 24 hours on request, and opens on any phone from WhatsApp, with no app and no login.

Kesariya, our saffron and marigold design for Marwari, Rajput and Rajasthani families, gives the mahira dastoor a card of its own beside the ganesh puja, the haldi, the mehndi, the sangeet, the baraat and the pheras, each with its time, a map button and a reply form.

The Marwari wedding guide lists the other dastoors in order, and the tilak guide covers the function the groom's family hosts.

Mayra and bhaat wording you can copy

Cards in Hindi and English first, then the bhaat nyota to the brother, then WhatsApp messages. Change the names, dates, times and places in [brackets].

Want these words on a real invitation? See the designs.

Hindu wedding invitation designs

8 designs you can personalise. Open any one to see it full size, with a live demo.

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